It’s not a typo.

I remember clearly the ‘wiggle’ of intense internal discomfort I felt when I started to think about putting myself first.

I was in an abusive relationship – never mind the gory details – and for anyone who has been in one, they will understand the scary dynamic thrust and parry of trying to get out.

I wasn’t raised to be abused. It was never in the background of my childhood. Physical discipline wasn’t the norm in my family; nor was belittling.

But here I was, anyway, in an abusive relationship, trying to get out.  Which is where the idea of ‘being selfish’ took on a whole new meaning.

Later on, while training for police services, I learned the concept of “ensure no danger to yourself, ensure no danger to your partner, then help the public”.

And in between those two points I had to work very hard to redefine who I was being, as I was living.  How dare I,  and could I,  put my own self-interest and preservation before that of others.

BEing First isn’t about winning, nor is it about beating others, or even helping others, it’s about knowing who you are and what you stand for relative to the world around you.

It’s the who am I ‘BE-ing‘ as I go about the ‘Do-ing‘ in my life.

It’s also about balancing yourself against the demand of the world that you be ‘selfless’.